The Death of the Family

Initial thoughts:

Dr. James Dobson has made his living decrying the death of the family.
The Corrections, Jonathan Franzen's latest novel and perhaps the last book that will ever be published in the "high art literary tradition," is essentially about a family coming together for Christmas.
Countless movies now end with the main character finally realizing the importance of family.

Clearly the family, as an institution, is in trouble. Dr. Dobson has a veritable empire; Franzen is almost certainly a millionaire by now; sentimental movies have been known to occasionally beat out the more traditional "gratuitous sex and violence" Hollywood fare. Capitalism only works on things that can be easily controlled and marketed: for instance, before music could become the wildly profitable industry it is today, people's taste in music had to be systematically dismantled and rebuilt to correspond to what the record companies found easiest to make. Now the family is well on its way to being as profitable as music, which is the clearest possible evidence that it is in its death throes. This is illustrated in the sentimental "family" movies: never does the film provide any concrete way for the character to act on his (usually his) epiphany about the importance of family life. American Beauty, which celebrates irresponsibility and every possible "anti-family" attitude, ends with the protagonist realizing that he has not been a good enough father. Then it makes the brilliant move of stepping beyond the movies that merely cut out when the protagonist must start to build an actual, real-life family life -- the protagonist is shot in the head and as a result is every bit as incapable of building a family as is his audience.

The movie makers realize that making a real family has always required a lot of thankless, boring work; they know that no one wants to sit and watch that kind of thing. They also understand what all of us are feeling right now: that it just isn't worth it. It is nice, certainly, to get a warm, "family" feeling every now and then, either with one's own family or through a book or movie. But those are rare in the case of an actual group of real people, whereas the movie cuts straight to the warm, "family" feeling without any hassle. In addition, most movie stars are better looking than the members of one's own family. Overall, "the family," in its commercialized form, is a viable and even valuable product that all of us can support.

In coming years, while the family will be slowly dying off because of people who can't be bothered to get married or stay that way for more than six months or because of stupid kids who sit in their rooms in front of the computer instead of gaining wisdom from their parents or because of schools and jobs that demand ever-more time, "the family" will likely get better and better. As we slip into the dream of a world of fully individualized consumers, each with his or her personal product preferences duly noted, we will not need to dream back wistfully to the days of the family, because we will always carry its trace in "the family."

Within the next thirty years, scientists predict that "the family" will even be available in pill form, with an appropriate and tasteful selection of colors and flavors for discerning "family"-oriented consumers. At that point, experts hope that "parents" will finally be freed of their need to purchase products on their children's behalf in what has rapidly become the only remaining "natural" way to get a "family" feeling. "Parents" will simply pop a pill and give money directly to their children so that they can gain valuable money-wasting skills earlier in life. Experts further predict that Dr. Dobson will be dead by that point, leaving us to celebrate the death of the family without any unnecessary guilt.

There is nothing to feel guilty about.